Hurting?

People, distance, things that change,
Everyday is something strange.
Now we move, far apart.
Not just in miles, but in our hearts.
Does the swallow carry love,
Across the moors that
blah blah blah


It's been said a million times, in thousands of blogs and poems-- Love sucks.
Relationships are synonymous with heartache.
So what is it that people want?
It seems a fundamental, we all want love.
So what makes it so hard to love others?

If love is something that everyone wants, if acceptance is something that everyone longs for, and affirmation is something everyone desires, what makes it so hard to give it out? Is it so difficult to hand out the thing that we desire the most? When you open yourself up to someone, and hope that they accept you-- all your flaws, quirks, hopes and dreams-- you leave yourself open to a world of rejection. You allow your deepest desires to be judged and lay them bare to be trampled on. So why is it, that people keep seeking love? Why can't we find it in ourselves the love we want from others? Because, it's easier to love yourself. It's easier to affirm your own choices, its easier to accept what you are, but asking others to accept you and love you is getting affirmation from the world. If the world can love you, then you have everything. But then we're back at the beginning, why can't we give everything to others? Is it so difficult to let little things go? The problem is that we love ourselves so much that we can't love others. It's a catch-22. Unless we are loved, we find it hard to love others because we don't love ourselves. Over and over. It's human nature to shy away from differences. We can't unconditionally love people who are different. Different speech, hygiene, hopes, morals, aspirations, interactions with the world. Different. And with rejection, hundreds of unwanted questions attack.
Was I not good enough?
Did I do something wrong?
Am I too clingy?
Did he even like me in the first place?
Was it all a lie?
And those these questions may have no logical basis, they keep itching at your mind like a bug bite. Because the basis of your identity has been rejected.
And maybe there are good reasons accompanying these rejections, nevertheless, heartache attacks leaving these pesky questions behind.
SO what do we do?

Love.


Do the thing we despise the most at the moment. You hurt, so does everyone. No one is completely happy with themselves or with their relationships, so end the cycle.
Easier said than done.
But,
give someone some love.
People that see you loving want to love you back. If you see someone without a smile, give them yours.
Ask someone how they are,
How they really are.
And listen to the answer.
Tell someone they are beautiful.
Don't just say you love someone, tell them why.
If you can't love, how can you expect to get it back?
And someday, if you wait, someone is gonna find you
and sweep you off your feet, and want to love you. All of you, even the temper tantrums you throw when you loose at Monopoly.
and send you notes, just because they want you to think of them. Flowers because he wants you to smile.
Then its all worth it.

So I propose a challenge,
Love someone different from you.
Not your best friend…that's too easy.
Love someone you don't agree with,
Send them an email listing things you like about them.
And maybe they'll pass it on. And that's all it takes.
This world needs a little love, on this we all agree,
They why won't this pattern, start with you and me.

:)