Saturday, January 23, 2010

It's a step. And we move in a dance, a whirlwind. Emotions run high, then..nothing. Trust and betrayal. And hope, always hope. Guiding us, moving us forward. 

And we walk. Faster, further away from who we were. Closer to an obscure version of ourselves; who did we want to be? Each beat takes us further away from what we thought.
 
There's laughter. But the laughter brings tears. Peace. Taken from us. Moving ceaselessly we change. Ever molding into some being unbeknowest to us. 

Suffocation.  Struggling with every ounce to fight. Being sucked into the waves. Do you know me? Do you know you? We've nothing to prove, still we fight. 

Acceptance. Warmth floods my soul. Free from self conciousness. Me. You. Them. Us. Together. We laughed, ran, teased, shared, lost, fought, sighed. Gone. 

Rejection. Every flaw times ten. Too short, too fat. Too rude, too loud, too quiet, too wrong, too right, too bad, too good, too odd, too normal. Too me. 

An idea. Growing, pulsing, taking life. Maybe? No. Uncertainty. Do you? Do I?when? How? Could you? I could. Hope, resignation. Anxiety. Am I good enough for him? Please 

Longing. Lonely, waiting for light. Trusting it may come. Pushing.  Pulling. Ebb and flow. Closer, further. Must you go? 

Wounds open. Where are you? Why not me? What is she, everything I couldn't be. Disillusioned. Leaking emotions. Fix it. Come back, fill my emptiness. But still you stay. 

He. Everything. Constant, He fills me. Soveriegn. Never good enough, yet He loves me. You are. I, weak, lowly. His? Full. Complete, only He fills me. 
Broken so I could be whole. 

Harmony.